Hanging on for Forever.
Journals Links Tagboard in Love.
Perfect pair of jeans.


Bakit ganito pa?

Bakit nagkaganun?

Saan ako nagkamali?

Saan ka nagkulang?

Bakit ko nagawa?

Bakit mo ko hinayaan?

Saan ba nagsimula?

Saan ko tatapusin?

Kaya ko ba?

Kaya mo ba?

Ano bang meron?

Ano bang wala?

Paano ba dapat?

Paano kung ayaw?

Saan ako nagkulang?

Saan ka sumobra?

Sino ba sa inyo?

Sino ba sa kanila?

Kanino ka nga ba?

Kanino nga ba ako?

Bakit?

Bakit tayo?

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Wishlist.


Ever got the feeling of wanting everything and turns out you can't even have one? Yun yung feeling ko ngayon. I want a new phone, an ipod shuffle and even my own digicam. But I can't even have one. :(

Tapos I'm thinking na if I have one, would it made me contented? I just think, no. Human nature na yun. We're still craving for more. Even if everything is on our way. Maybe, this isn't what I wanted after all. Nalulungkot ako para sa sarili ko. Nababadtrip ako sa Nokia Service Center. Err. 5days is too long. No phone at all. Grabe. Thank you kei nanay kasi, kahit papano, pinahiram ako.

Naiiyak na ko sa sobrang dae ng mali sa buhay ko. Sa sobrang dami ng nangyayari. Nung una naman, hindi ganito. :(

Err. Trust. Faith lang. Humihina ata. Cheer up Epi. Hold tight

*sigh*

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Nakakamiss.


E kasi, kanina nagpunta kami ng Marcelo ni Rossel para makakuha ko ng certification na kasama ko sa upper 25% ng graduates ng batch namin. Kasama naman ako e.Upper 5% pa nga. Hahaha. FYI, rank 65 ako over 1978 graduates. Pwede na magyabang. Hahaha :) Pero hindi tungkol dun yung blog ko. Mageemo lang ako ng unti ha :)

Sa pagpasok pa lang sa munting gate ng aking paaralan, iba na yung naisip ko.

Dati, hindi naman ganun yung pasukan, binabaha pa nga yun e. Antaas na ngayon ha.
Dati, hindi ganun ka-approachable yung mga guards. Ngayon, tinulungan pa nila ko makita si Lamberto.
Dati, kahit maraming tao dun
, feeling ko safe ako. Ngayon, mukha silang mga *****.
Dati, lahat s
ila nakauniform. Ngayon, puro sila pormahan. Malamang, maguniform daw ba para lang magenroll.
Dati, lahat ng nakakasalubong ko kakilala ko. Ngayon, kahit isang pagmumukha, hindi ko makilala.

Nagbago na kaagad? Ambilis naman ata.


Habang nasa record section ako kanina, ang gara ng feeling. Parang dati lang, nanghihingi ako ng Form137 kasi kelangan para sa application sa UPCAT, ngayon, iba na yung hinihingi ko. Ambilis noh? Tapos, nakita ko pa si Mam Myrna Dela Cruz yung teacher ko sa General Science nung First yea
r, nakakatouch kasi natatandaan pa niya kami . After mangulit ng mga teacher sa AP, pumunta na kami sa guard para itanong tong bagay na to:

Sel&Epi: Anu po bang kelangan para makapasok kami dito sa GABAG?
Guards(madae kasi sila ) : Letter galing sa teacher in charge.
Sel&Epi: Kei Mam Vivo po?
Guards: Oo. Sa kanya.
Sel&Epi: Ay. Oh sige po. Salamat. Sa susunod na pagkikita na lang ulit.

Dati lang, nangunguna yung section namin sa pagcheer sa apat kong kaklase nun. Ngayon, maglilipat na ng title si James. Kasabay na kaya nun yung pagsasabi na, Porwan, eto na yung huli nyung pagkikita? Wag na
man sana. Ayoko.

Habang lumalabas kami ng gate, di ko mapigilang lumingon pabalik. Eto yung lugar na minsan nang naging saksi sa mga kahinaan ko sa buhay. Kasama ko to sa lahat ng achievements. Sa lahat ng happenings. Sa bawat tawa at iyak ng barkada. Yung Building A na tatlong taon kong tinirhan, yung init dun. Yung siksikang classroom. Lahat namimiss ko. Lalo yung mga taong kasama ko
sa paghihirap. Sa lahat ng problem sa Physics. Sa lahat ng functions na tinuturo ni Mam Ana. Err. Ang cheesy ko.

Ayun. Nakalabas na ko Marcelo H. del Pilar National High School. Panahon para maggrow mag-isa. Panahon para lumibot pa sa ibang parte ng buhay. :)

Eto na yun, isa na ko sa alumni ng Marcelo. Nanga
ko na nga ako nung graduation e. Habang tinititigan ko, nalulungkot ako lalo. Nakakaiyak pala. Ang hirap nila ilet go. Ang hirap ng malayo sila sa'yo. SILA LANG KASI e! (kasi e?)

Sabi nga nila:
Una - una lang yan!

Sabi ng Porwan:

Sa Reunion ha. Swimming ulit.

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Because I love you.


Oh. Quite sure, I'm not confuse. Please bare with me. :(

Paano na ko?

Hanggang kailan?

Hanggang saan?

Sino kasama ko? Mag-isa lang ba ko? Bat ayaw mo ko samahan?

Errr. Andaya daya mo! Galit tayo. :(

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Figures.


Yes. Yes. But it's not the only thing, it's just one of those. Figures, yes. I'm starting to lose weight. Many people notices that huh? Good job I think :) Second thing, I was happy about the commercial, the feminine wash ba yun? Hahaha. I'm not sure. Yung mei, As I start my forever with him, single Sophia, signing off. True enough na there are people who still believe in forever. And yes, I'm one of those.

Things happen only once. Yes. Kim tried to call me last time, pero hindi ko nasagot. Badtrip kaya yun. Todo effort yun tao, tapos hindi mo nasagot. Naiiyak pa ko nun. Tulog na tulog kasi ko. Err. Sorry ney. :(

And one things for sure, enjoy sa Montalban. Lagi naman e. Hahaha. Kaya gustong gusto kong umuuwi dun. :)

I'm starting to count those days. Sandali na lang. Nandito kna ulit :)

I never chose him, and he never chose me. So how could it be a mistake?

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Proficiency Test.


So, it was a day with my future. We took a test with English and my water loo, Math. We started the test at around 10 am and I finished the first one (English) at 11am. And we took the worst at exactly 1 in the afternoon, and woah, I finished it at 1:30 pm at my clock. Amazing isn't it? If we past the test, Math 17 will be our subject. If we fail the test, there will be a separate subject between College Algebra and Trigonometry which is I think, better. :)

Okay. I was a bit excited about my college plans. Realizations? Subject and Verb agreement, let's meet again. Hahahaha. :)

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LBC


It was just another cheesy story. Hahaha. At 2 in the afternoon (May 13 2009), Mhyla , Yssa and I decided to see each other so that we can sent a letter to them, the Team Marcelo, the MAAP boys. :)

It costs us Php 75.00 to sent a letter to Norvie and Kim. Hahaha. Nagjoke pa kami ni Mhyla,
pagdating nila sisingilin natin sila.
Together with the letter was those three mailing stamps so they can write us back. Haha. Very supportive ang cheerers nila dito sa Bulacan. After that, Mhyla went home, I think while Yssa and I decided to go at BulSU, for a not-so-special-thing. Then we went to Malolos Bayan, we have a hard time finding a cheap converse high cut. Lahat mahal. Hahaha. We gave up, so we ate at Jollibee and we saw Rodolfo there, at the cashier, yung Newton na boyfriend ni Estephanie. Ay. nakita din namin si Rossel and she said to me,
Epi. Ampayat mo. Nagdodroga kba?
Hahaha. Mei epekto naman pala yung pagpapayat ko. Oyeah. :) Ocge. Dito na lang. Masyadong enjoy to. Hahahaha.

LBC will always be the, Hari ng Padala.

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Happy Mother's Day.


Oh. It's May 10 and I want to extend my warmest greetings to every mother I've met and I've known. From my classmates supportive mothers, up to my ever dearest Nanay, let me say my gratitude to everyone. Nene, is her nickname. Leonila, was the given name to her. Yan ang nanay ko. Yan si Nanay Nene. My bestfriend, my first teacher, my first instructor, my personal nurse who never fails to take care of me whenever I'm sick, my counselor, my ever reliable friend, my secret keeper. The one who never fails me inspite of my high standard. She's my mother and I'm proud to be her stalker. We may not be the most bonded atoms, but I know, we will always be the most precious gems of all time. :)
The influence of a good mother is the world's mightiest force in shaping tomorrow's men and women.

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Happy second Labsters's Day.


Woah. Last night, CJ (Chad's boyfriend; currently studying at MAAP) texted me this: Epi? ui. CJ Lim to. received at 8:46 p.m. But I read it at around 10 na. That time, I don't have any load to response from his urgent text message. So, i immediately used the service of the autoloadmax. I replied to him, Ui. CJ. Bakit? But he isn't responding, so I texted Chad to ask her, what the hell happened. She replied to me, mei sulat si Kim. Itetext nya sayo yung nakalagay. Antay ka nlang mmya o kaya bukas. So, I said my gratitude to both of them, for the care and time they've given us. So I slept with my mobile phone. As I woke up, it was around 4 in the morning, there was no text from CJ. So I sleep again. At around 8 in the morning, waah. I have a missed call from CJ. So I hurriedly checked my inbox, two messages from him. Yung sulat na ginawa ni Kim, tinext nya sakin yung laman.

My man is too sweet. Ginawa nya yun para lang batiin ako for our second monthsary. It was so true, that I'm taken by the best. Thank you for giving me this attention. I have a total trust in the idea that we will be together, when both of us is on our best shot. And just because I have no idea what he might be doing, doesn't mean he doesn't care. Who knows? Maybe, he's here with me na. :)

This is all that matters. He's there. I'm here. It doesn't matter how long, as long as he's heart and his love is with me.

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Woah.


Okay. I'll start this blog as happy as it can be. First good thing, i manage to go at Bulacan Polytechnic College. The (put something in here) college in our province. Second thing, I have two new shirts. Thank you Janelle and Joy for the company. Lab ko kayo. :) Third thing, I almost realize that, waaah, tomorrow is our second monthsary. Not that excited. :) Love. Love.

That's all for now.

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and you can't help but smile.


Wait. First, check my Who I Want to Meet section in my Friendster account. Hahaha. I can't help but smile when i see those amazing pictures of ours. We look good together. Somehow, there are some things that bothers my mind whenever I check into my account.

Are those pictures will be chersihed forever? I know, pictures fade, but the memories within it can't. Yun bang,
ney, magpicture tayo. ganito pose natin ha. Grabe. At the rooftop of Dory's house, nagpakavain kami. Namimiss ko ang sister group ng CPRANJJ. :)

Will that moving-slash-animated picture will last on that section? Yung tipong di mapapalitan ng ibang tao? Hay. Sana hindi. Sana kaya ko. Sana kaya mo. Sana kaya natin.

I'm taken by the best. caption of my primary picture. Hahaha. Totoo. BEST na sya, of all the men i've met. Nakanaman. Si Kim lang nagsabi sakin na kei arte ko. Na magsuklay ako kasi ang gulo ng buhok ko. Na magpapayat na ko kasi mei nakukurot na sya sa tiyan ko. Na magpakabaet ako, magaral mabuti. Si KIM lang.

Ney, thank you for letting those things happen.
Thank you for taking those vain pictures with me. Thank you for giving me and sharing me those good memories we have and we will always cherish. Thank you for loving me as who I am. Thank you for taking care of my healthy heart. Thank you for keeping me safe as always. Thank you for always giving me that limit in everything I do. Thank you for that almost everything. I love you.

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Missing


I'm now off for today's feeling. Ate went home at around 6:30 pm from her OJT at Makati and I miss her a lot. The feeling of missing someone who truly understands you despite of everything. Aww. At 9o'clcok in the evening, Nanay, Ate and I decided to buy an ice cream, the Sorbetes one. After eating, I feel so incomplete. I dunno why. As I was typing this, my mobile phone is ringing very much, woah. 98 text messages since 5 in the afternoon. Waaa. People, don't flood me. I'll read everything later. Hmm. I miss you ney. Come back to me or else. Hahahaha. :)

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Dreaming.


Uh-oh. May1 . We've been apart for almost 2 weeks and I'm used to it. No text messages, no IMs, no sweet compliments and of course, I miss those simple fights with him.

Waa. It's been 4 days since the last post I have here. I miss typing out my emotions here. I'm still reading The Time Traveler's Wife and I'm enjoying every bit of it. As though, you feel the emotions in the story and you're on the scene itself. I dreamt of him, of Kim. I was with my classmates; I enjoy chatting with them, tell stories with them and making myself busy through them. But as I was watching my own dream, I realized Kim is not on the scene, on my ever-happy moment. Why? Is he leaving? Is he giving me up? Those realizations came up when I woke up. Dreams do come true, and I'm wishing this one will not. Sigh. Fighting.

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» Wall Off. «
Hi. Thanks for dropping by. BTW, everything here is under my spell. So don’t try to copy then paste something. Leave everything in here. Okay? FYI. All things published here was one of those pieces happened in my enjoy-every-moment of my life. I'm a blogger since you'd find your way here. :) I'm not good in grammar so don't expect a perfect and straight one here. If you're unhappy, then you're free to leave.
» Young Lady. «

♥ iloveyou :D

APRIL JOYCE ARANETA CANDOR 15 years young. Freshie at University of the Philippines Diliman Extension Program in Pampanga and currently taking up BA Business Economics. Unique and of course, one of a kind. Violet. Pictures. Photo editing. Food. is surely love.
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» Sway with the tune. «
Music lighten down our spirit and force us to reminisce something or even someone. All it takes is just one song to remember one simple and meaningful event in one's life.
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You know what? I’m so in love with that guy. He always made me feel that I’m so special. I will always find a way to understand everything between us. I will never complain about you. I will never surrender. I know you’ll come back to me. I will never let you go. I know I’m not worth loving but still you tried. Thank you for the chances. Thank you for making me feel this way. Thank you for correcting all my mistakes and for accepting all my flaws. I love you so much ney. I’m waiting to see you soon. We’re together in this journey. So much from me.