Hanging on for Forever.
Journals Links Tagboard in Love.
How do i breathe - Mario.


Another song title. Hahaha. Yah. I know. You're tired of reading my entries just because, it's all about him. Remember, you're on my page. Leave if you don't like either. :)

I wonder how true is true love?

Yes. Is the adjective true enough? Maybe a little less, a little more. True love never surrenders. True love never complains. It might get tired but a little rest is enough to love again at its best. It always finds a way to understand.

I wonder why I can't seem to let him go. Even if the world gives us so many reasons to give up, one reason is enough to make us stay. It's the lifetime happiness, the assurance we have after all. I want to stay. Stay enough for good.

As early as now, sorry for all the things. Dun sa sinayang kong love mo. Nung binalewala ko dati yun. Remember, twice na kita nasaktan. Pero you're still here with me. Thank you for always being there, for not giving me up.

I love you much much much much ney.

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My one and only.


The title itself was a song. Nahihilig ata ako sa mga song title. :)

5 more days and I'll start the ayoko-pang-mag-aral thing, my college life. Yes. I have my plans as anyone do. Thinking if my first year will be tough or so I say. I will just reminisce something from somewhere. Okay. The drama will start, close your eyes now.

How are you going to live when your life was almost about him? How are you going to endure every single moment knowing he won't be there?

The time when we used to go to school together. Hahaha. Nakakatawa yung unang beses na yun and I think, huli na din. Ambilis mong maglakad kasi wala ka pang assignment sa Physics.

How I criticize other people and he would just agree with me. Hahaha. Yah. We're too bad. Siya lalo. :)

The way he saves me from the hell math and physics subject of ours.

How he go wild when I smile. Yes. Wild.

Sit next to each other after eating our lunch with our friends. Dun kna magkkwento ng mga chismis sakin.

That I know his friendster password and even his Yahoo account.

The way we sing together.

The way we laugh even at our corniest jokes.

How impatient I am when we had our Physics assignment and he'd volunteer to do it for me.

The way he treats me like a child.

How bad I miss us when it's raining.

How he doesn't want to see me with other boys because he's too afraid he might lose me. Boy. Sa'yo lang ako. Prames :D

The way he holds my hand and doesn't want to let go.

When people look strange at me because I'm pinching his nose.

How I can tell him everything and anything. Even my red alert. :)

How he looks like a kid when he says sorry.

How cute he is when he is mad.

How we fight our views into something and realizing that it's non sense and all that we know is, we love each other.

How he compare his high grades with mine. Hahaha. I know. Ikaw na. :)

That I still trust him no matter how negligent he gets.

When things get a little between the two of us, and the best way to escape is to eat and eat and we're fine.

When I'm too scared of the pain, but he always keeps me up and willing to stand up for me.

That no matter how many times we hurt each other I know that my sanctuary is still in his arms, in my home.

How he used to be my hero, my angel and my sweetest sin.

The whole year we've spent in Building A Room 12.

I miss everything.

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I can wait forever


The title of this post was the song Kim once GM-ed to his friends even to me. Simple Plan once did it as a hit. :)

Okay. I think this post was before and after his arrival. Err. Reminiscing. I hate doing that thing.

"Do you ever miss him?"
"Every day, every minute."

I feel a weird combination of freedom and despair. Freedom. Yes, I have a complete one. I can do everything without asking for his permission. But the loyalty, the faithfulness and the love I promise to last with him forever, always change my mind. He always says to me, " Ney, kung ayaw mo na sakin, sige lang ha. Naiintindihan ko naman e. mahirap tong sitwasyon natin." But the mere fact that I can, never change my mind. I am responsible for who and what will I become, and I will do it as though a I have my free will. Despair. It's something like this:

" I won't ever leave you even if you're always leaving me."
" But I never want to leave you."

Yung 1 1/2 days nya dito, ambilis. Parang isang oras lang. Gusto kong magreklamo, umiyak, magsumbong, pero wala kong magagawa. Hay. Isang malalim na paghinga. Magisa nanaman. Wala nanaman sya.

"don't be critical about love. lahat yan mei tamang oras at tamang panahon. ngayon, magtiis muna tayo. pagkatpos neto, habangbuhay na."

he wrote that in his letter. nung nabasa ko, nabuhayan ako ng loob. nakakaiyak. nakakamiss. ang masakit, wala kang magawa. pero meron na pala. ansarap isipin na kaya pala sya nagtagal dun, kasi binigyan mo sya ng lakas ng loob. tiwala lang ney. makikita mo :)

Ay. Yesterday was our 3rd monthsary. Wee. We're together and I'm happy. I've touched those cheeks again and I lean on the same shoulder after a long time. Haha. Talo ka. You did it again. You first did it and I never insists you to do so. Anyways, namiss ko yun. Next labster's day again huh? Promise? :D

I want to go home with you na. I'm waiting until that perfect time comes. I love you so much ney. I'm waiting to see those matabang cheeks of yours. Hahaha. :)

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Perfect pair of jeans.


Bakit ganito pa?

Bakit nagkaganun?

Saan ako nagkamali?

Saan ka nagkulang?

Bakit ko nagawa?

Bakit mo ko hinayaan?

Saan ba nagsimula?

Saan ko tatapusin?

Kaya ko ba?

Kaya mo ba?

Ano bang meron?

Ano bang wala?

Paano ba dapat?

Paano kung ayaw?

Saan ako nagkulang?

Saan ka sumobra?

Sino ba sa inyo?

Sino ba sa kanila?

Kanino ka nga ba?

Kanino nga ba ako?

Bakit?

Bakit tayo?

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Wishlist.


Ever got the feeling of wanting everything and turns out you can't even have one? Yun yung feeling ko ngayon. I want a new phone, an ipod shuffle and even my own digicam. But I can't even have one. :(

Tapos I'm thinking na if I have one, would it made me contented? I just think, no. Human nature na yun. We're still craving for more. Even if everything is on our way. Maybe, this isn't what I wanted after all. Nalulungkot ako para sa sarili ko. Nababadtrip ako sa Nokia Service Center. Err. 5days is too long. No phone at all. Grabe. Thank you kei nanay kasi, kahit papano, pinahiram ako.

Naiiyak na ko sa sobrang dae ng mali sa buhay ko. Sa sobrang dami ng nangyayari. Nung una naman, hindi ganito. :(

Err. Trust. Faith lang. Humihina ata. Cheer up Epi. Hold tight

*sigh*

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» Wall Off. «
Hi. Thanks for dropping by. BTW, everything here is under my spell. So don’t try to copy then paste something. Leave everything in here. Okay? FYI. All things published here was one of those pieces happened in my enjoy-every-moment of my life. I'm a blogger since you'd find your way here. :) I'm not good in grammar so don't expect a perfect and straight one here. If you're unhappy, then you're free to leave.
» Young Lady. «

♥ iloveyou :D

APRIL JOYCE ARANETA CANDOR 15 years young. Freshie at University of the Philippines Diliman Extension Program in Pampanga and currently taking up BA Business Economics. Unique and of course, one of a kind. Violet. Pictures. Photo editing. Food. is surely love.
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» Sway with the tune. «
Music lighten down our spirit and force us to reminisce something or even someone. All it takes is just one song to remember one simple and meaningful event in one's life.
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You know what? I’m so in love with that guy. He always made me feel that I’m so special. I will always find a way to understand everything between us. I will never complain about you. I will never surrender. I know you’ll come back to me. I will never let you go. I know I’m not worth loving but still you tried. Thank you for the chances. Thank you for making me feel this way. Thank you for correcting all my mistakes and for accepting all my flaws. I love you so much ney. I’m waiting to see you soon. We’re together in this journey. So much from me.